so me and Kayla are looking at apartments or whatever and she said she didn’t want to live on the south side of town, mostly because basically a lot of the crime here happens on the south side of town. I on the other hand wouldn’t mind it because pretty much all the apartments on this side if town are cheap and I have lived on the south side my whole life but I specifically said no to two of the apartment complexes because they’re like the worst of the worst and she texted me saying she was looking at apartments and one of them she liked was Twin Oaks which was one of them I said no to and I’m just like noooooo omg. I wouldnt even live there. Like.. I mean I would but id rather not. Just nooooooo omg.
my girlfriend wants to sell her kidney and im trying to tell her its illegal in america and she doesn’t belive me
….i have watched all 14 seasons of law & order: svu… i know what im talking about
i was talking to my girlfriend and brought up sigmund freud and she was like ‘who..?? the lion guys..?’ and i was so confused and then i realized she thought i was talking about siegfried and roy..
girlfriend: *telling me story about someone hitting on her*... are you jealous?
me: why do you always want me to be jealous?
girlfriend: I JUST WANT YOU TO LIKE ME AND BE JEALOUS
kayla is going through my archive to find when i first started talking about her and its making me really angry and anxious cause like that’s like private like you guys don’t count cause you guys (well there was less of you back then) but you guys put up with it AND YOU AREN’T THE PERSON IT WAS WROTE ABOUT WHILE I WAD BEING A DUMB FICKING DUMB GIRL WITH DUMB GIRL CRUSHES BEING A DUMB TEENAGE GIRL LIKE THIS IS SO DUMB JUST AHHHDHDGVSBXNCNFNBXB
3 months ago59 plays
So me and my spicy mother aka my best frannd went on like a little shopping spree today and bought a whole butch of shit.
I JUST REMEMBERED THAT LAST NIGHT I HAD A DREAM ABOUT GOING TO THIS LIKE… ZOO/CIRCUS/MUSICAL/AWARDS SHOW WITH KAYLA AND THERE WERE ALL THESE ANIMALS IN FRONT OF THE STAGE LIKE IT WAS A PETTING ZOO OR SOMETHING AND THEN THE AUDIENCE WAS ALL CELEBRITIES AND THERE WERE BABY GIRAFFES AND BABY ELEPHANTS AND THEY WERE SO CUTE AND LITTLE A FUZZY AND THEY COULD FIT IN YOUR HAND AND THEY WERE LIKE LITTLE BABY KITTENS ONLY THEY WERE GIRAFFES AND ELEPHANTS AND OMG I WANT TO GO BACK ALSO RUSSELL BRAND WAS THERE BECAUSE HE WON SOME AWARD AND HE ALMOST STEPPED ON ONE OF THE ELEPHANTS SO I GRABBED IT AND STARTED CLIMBING THIS ROPE THIS THAT HELD UP THE CURTAINS ON STAGE AND STARTED SWINGING FROM THE BANISTERS AND WHATEVER AND SAVED IT AND BASICALLY I WON ALL OF THE AWARDS AND THE MAYOR OF THE CIRCUS OR SOMETHING LET ME AND KAYLA TAKE HOME TWIN BABY MINIATURE ELEPHANTS OKAY THAT WAS THE BEST DREAM
This morning I woke up at like 10 or something.. and Kayla is in my bed.
so kayla has been like trying really hard to help me be not sick.
mostly because the other day she came over on her lunch break and brought me chicken nuggets and i was showing her how my mom turns our house into christmas vomit once december come and she saw there was mistletoe in the living room and i told her im not kissing her because im sick
and i dont want to get her sick
even though she was already sick
but im mean she’s like way better now so
she only wants me to be healthy so she can kiss me
I just remembered that Kayla spanked me really hard earlier.
I have nothing else to say.
Still awake because I’m dumb and I’m sick.
so i just remembered that last night kayla stopped by and she kept trying to put her fingers in my mouth and im just like. wtf why
and she just kept trying to and im like WHY DO YOU WANT TO PUT YOUR FINGERS IN MY MOUTH? and shes just like why not so then she was trying to put her thumb in my mouth and it was just really weird idgi. is this like a normal thing that people do